Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Day 7: Give your Life a Narrative

Using day 6's excercise create a narrative of your life.

To express your response to this exercise, you should take a fresh look at your life map and write out in paragraph form exactly what your life would look like with all seven areas combined. You should be as specific as possible – you want to paint an inspiring mental picture with your narrative. Use I have and I am statements.

My friends are a very important part of my life. So to express my level of gratitude for their presence in my life, I decided to host a dinner party tonight in their honor. If you know anything about me, I enjoy hosting events, not cooking. So of course, I went and got Carrabas to cater tonight’s dinner. It helped getting a caterer because my job is so demanding. Working as a consultant to many up-coming businesses can be hard on the mind, body and soul! Thank goodness I’m cut out perfectly for this job. I enjoy helping people turn ideas into profit! Having gotten my M.B.A has definitely helped my credibility in the consultant field, and also helped me raise my rates! Oh the money! It feels so good J Looking back, I now see that if I had never gotten a hold on my finances, making more money would not truly have helped my situation. I would just be spending more money, on more things I didn’t need. Now I save at least half of my leisure fund. Don’t get me wrong, I splurge *holding up my new chanel bag* but, now the difference is, is that I can honestly afford to. I weigh 130 lbs, and am a proud vegan of two years. My skin feels better than ever, I have more energy then ever and I just feel better about myself all around. My daughter is getting smarter and smarter and I love how she comes and tells me everything! I enjoy being there for her. Most of all I am happy with my husband. I remember the time when I honestly wasn’t sure if I could ever be happy being married. I knew I could be content, but the question was, would I be happy? I am very happy.

I don't believe the last part. Im not sure if I'm ready for this excercise. I don't know why I can't visualize myself happy. Wow. thats a huge problem.

Monday, December 6, 2010

My Life Map

Day 6
Life Map



My brother's keeper, My sisters shoulder, and My daughters mother.

P R E T T Y W I T T Y N A E
Personal Mission Statement
Day 5

Sooner than later, I'll be older than younger and explanations and scapegoates will mean less. I hold myself to a high degree of accountability and want to be able to be true to what I believe in. I am most of all my brother's keeper, my sister's shoulder, my daughters mother and am responsible for the message that I send and the example that I set. I want to take my knowledge of Religion and my God given talent to lead and influence to do exactly that, lead and send a positive influence on those around me. In helping others, I will help myself. I value my relationships, how secure my life is and work actively on becoming a better individual for myself. "And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." I understand that being a better me, helps you be a better you. It is my mission to be my brother's keeper, my sisters shoulder, and my daughters mother.

Playing Catch UP!!!

This weekend was crazy. Well no it actually wasn't, I just wasn't really in the 'blogging mood' per say...but am I now!

Day 4: Compare Values to how I'm currently Living
Score myself on how my values compare to my life and List three actions that I am taking or should be taking to make this happen.

1. Good Relationships
Score: 9
a. I am always thinking about people.
b. I always hang out with my friends and constantly evaluate how I am percieved and how I can be a better friend.
c. I really don't know what else to say, this one area that I think I do an AMAZING job.

2. Security
Score: 6
a. I need a better control on my financial situation. I need to at every moment actively understand and account for every penny that I spend, at least until I can get a hold on the situation.
b. I need to control my mind and realize that the things I really want in life may not produce temporary gratification, and be able to be satisfied with whats right in front of me because it may be just a few seeds now in comparison to a lovely rose, but whats one rose in comparison to a beautiful garden?

3. Achievement
Score 7
a. I want to finish my M.B.A by 2011
That is ALL.

4. Career Advancement
Score: 6.5
I don't know what to do, no flipping idea!

5. Motherhood
Score:7
a. Take Kelis on more fun field trips.
b. Do her hair EVERYDAY. I suck.
c. Take Kelis to Sabbath School..... (thats gonna be a HARD one.)

6. Religion
Score: 5
a. I need to do a daily devotional.
b. Rely more on the Lord.
c. Go to church <--duh. 7. Community Involvement Score: 0
a. Help others that need it. (Take chili to the homeless)
b. Finish my book, print it and send it out to people who need help.
c. Act as a mentor to young ladies.

8. Democracy'
Score:2
a. Vote for ALL ELECTIONS
b. Volunteer my spare time to the campaign.
c. Do my part to educate my community on the things going on in Capitol Hill.

9. Integrity
Score: 8.5
a. Remember my values in all decisions that I make.
b. Be selfless in decisions that involve others and my honesty.
c. Dont hold others accountable for things I don't even do myself.

10. Healthy Living
Score: 7
a. Try to stop eating cheese. Look for recipes that don't include it.
b. Take a daily vitamin with B12 and Iron.
c. Excercise at least twice a week. Find the time, find a gym find something!

Friday, December 3, 2010

“The size of the universe depresses many people, but not me, I'm delighted at it”

31 Day Reset Challenge
Day 3
Prettywittynae's Top Ten Values

1. Good Relationships
2. Security
3. Achievement
4. Career Advancement
5. Motherhood
6. Religion
7. Community Involvement
8. Democracy
9. Integrity
10. Healthy Living

That list was in no particular order lol. Someone reading this would probably think, "what kind of mother is she putting that in her list as number 6!" Again, its in no order.

UGHHH Before I had actually read todays assignment, I was walking to my office at work and thought to myself, I need a promotion. Not even for the money (I definitely want the money) but more so for the title change. I can NOT live a life being mediocre, I like to be the best. I have to be the best.

You know, I had a very very rough life. Proabably not a very, very, very rough life, but it was hard! People are literally amazed at where I am today, and often say things like, "you should be proud of where you are today, and no you arent where you want to be but imagine you could be a lot worse." I really question how I'm supposed to take that. So what, because I had a hard life, this is it for me, this is the end of the Road because I've made it this far? Is this my own personal glass ceiling? ...

Effe that..
How can the sky be the limit when the stars are above it?

P R E T T Y W I T T Y N A E

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Day 2: Conduct a Life Assessment

THIS IS LONG...But good and definitely opened my eyes...

Its 12:30 and already today I have learned life lessons and felt some pain. This assignment could not have come at a better time. I do find that my God is an 'on-time' God, and so having said that, he was right on time (by way of happyblackwoman) with this assignment!

The Purpose of Today's Assignment:

1.To force you to own up to exactly what’s lacking right now in your life.
2. To give you encouragement to build on what’s already great about it.

Before I actually give you excerpts from my assignment (NO I'M NOT PUTTING MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE ON THE INTERNET) I think its important that you know something about me..and if by chance I am the only person reading my blog it is also important that I continually recognize this fact about myself.
In everyone elses life, I see the glass half full. In my life, I have a very serious problem with seeing the glass half empty all the time. So when I read the first purpose of todays assignment, I thought, "great-like I don't already know whats lacking in my life right now." From there I continued in my head to think of all the areas of improvement that I needed, self-evaluation is actually something that I do on a very frequent basis. Of the many thoughts that I had amongst them were, I need better control of my finances, better control of my relationships, better control of my health, better control of my work, just better control! All I could think about was
the quote I chose for my personal mantra in Day 1's challenge,

"There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall
under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact
with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select
what I can read and eat and study. i can choose how I'm going to regard
unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or
opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to
others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts." ~Elizabeth Gilbert

A work sheet was made available that listed the different avenues of ones life, and the task was write what you love about that area and what you hate about it. I'll give you some examples of what is in my notebook.

Lifestyle: I love my free spirit, and ability to do what I want, pretty much when I want. I hate that any time I drink liquor I get a headache. Its a sign that I don't necessarily have control over that activity. I always have one too many drinks and while I don't drink everyday, or even every weekend this is becoming a problem that I need to nip in the bud completely or gain control.

Work: I love that I work for BP. I hate that its so hard for me to move up in my field. I FEEL like I'm not regarded as competition, just a very good worker who needs to put some time in. <--uhh I'm 26. Time has been given, I'm ready for change.

Education: Pretty Satisfied. LOL

Finances: I hateeeeeeeeee that I have spend like a mad woman. THe only thing I love is that I have a job.

Health: I hate that I can't cut out sweets and cheese. Its something that I have been wanting to do for sometime. But I love sweets and cheese so much that I can't give em' up! I do LOVE that in a year I lost 30 lbs. I am literally amazed everytime I look in the mirror. Amazed at myself for having the control to say no, to exercise, to be PATIENT with myself.

Relationships: I hate that its soo hard for me to get over people. I hate that I can not adapt to change and understand that change happens, that people are only in your life for seasons, and some for long periods of time. I hate that I am the girl that can't get over it. <--change that to was, cause I've gotten a HELL of a lot better.

Family: I love my family. I hate nothing at all about it except that my dad is dead. <--I hate that very much.

In my notebook, i used a lot of hates. However, my mantra is to help me control my thoughts, and I no longer what to think negatively, about anything. I love everything about the world. I love the fact that I can't get over people in and out my life for seasons, you know why? Because I love that I love hard. I love that I have the ability to love anyone, absolutely anyone. I love that I love my friends so much and that they love me. I love that I can see the good in anyone, even jerks. I love that I when I love the thought of losing people from my life makes me sick to my stomach, makes my breathing short, and makes me sad. Because that just means that I am LIVING. There is a compromise that I found from yes, Elizabeth Gilberts, Eat Pray Love that has helped me tremendously.

You know how I said I hate that I have become the girl that can't get over things? The old me, loved soo hard and was so heartbroken that people left my life that I acted mannish and just plain crazy. I thought that, them leaving meant I couldn't love them anymore. And I love to Love. So imagine how it made me feel knowing that I couldn't love them anymore. That was my mistake. Just because they are not an active part of my life does not mean that I can not love them, that I can not think of them, that I can not miss them. So now when I think,

"But I love them" I have a voice in my ear saying, "So love them" and when I think, "But I miss them" the voice replies saying, "So Miss them. Send them Love and Light everytime you think of them, then drop it"

Its very comforting knowing that I don't have to stop loving and praying for people who no longer have an active role in my life. Nothing is forever.

This excerpt from a movie helps explain my thoughts.

"Dear David, we haven't had any communication in a while and it's given me time I needed to think. Remember when you said that we should live with each other and be unhappy so we could be happy? Consider it as a testimony to how much I love you that I spent so much pouring myself into that offer trying to make it work. But a friend took me to the most amazing place the other day.It's called the Augusteum, Octavian Augustus built it to house his remains. Then the Barbarians came and trashed it along with everything else. The great Octavian Augustus, the first true great Roman emperor, how could he imagine that Rome, the whole world as far as he was concerned, would one day be in ruins? It's one of the quietest and loneliest places in Rome. The city has grown up around it over the centuries. *Feels like a precious wound, like a heartbreak that you dont want to let go of because it hurts too bad. We all want things to stay the same, settle for living in misery because we are afraid of change and things crumbling to a mess. Then I looked around at this place in Rome (the Augusteum) at the chaos it's endured, the way it's been adapted, burnt, pilfered, and found a way to build itself a way up again and again and I was re-assured may be my life has not been so chaotic, it's just the world that is, and the only true mistake is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift, ruin IS the road to transformation. Even in this Eternal City, the Augusteum showed me that we must always be prepared for waves of endless transformation. Both of us deserve better than staying together because we're afraid we'll be destroyed if we don't."

Conclusion: My life is CRAZY but I know its all going to be ok. I'm becoming a better person by accepting what I cannot change, actively changing what I can no matter my fears, not settling for B.S., and recognizing what already is GREAT in my life, and building on that.

P R E T T Y W I T T Y N A E

Forgive the spelling errors, Im rushing.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Personal Mantra of PrettyWittyNae


December 1, 2010
D A Y 1

1. Choose your 'reset' notebook 2. Choose your Personal Mantra.

Here I have to choose an inspring quote, proverb or phrase to dedicate my challenge to. Having just been deeply moved by Julia Roberts and Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat, Pray, Love. I am choosing a quote from the book/movie.


"There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts."Elizabeth Gilbert

So, what I want to actively embark on in this 31-Day reset challenge is working on choosing my thoughts and controling what I can.

P R E T T Y W I T T Y N A E